yes, I have come to see the pattern of self abandonment much more clearly … the turning away from self to serve the external … the cultural norms and expectations of how and who we are supposed be and what we are supposed to show up for. that feeling of urgency that you just want to go away because it is so damn uncomfortable. for me, the shape/the form of “discipline”in me is transforming and becoming something more like a capacity - to turn toward and be with the urgency and what it hides. to stop and feel and allow what’s moving.
Sometimes it’s so hard but it’s harder when you stop and have to start over again, the reward after completion makes it’s so worthwhile. Another pat on the back makes the likehood of stopping so much less likely.
yes, I have come to see the pattern of self abandonment much more clearly … the turning away from self to serve the external … the cultural norms and expectations of how and who we are supposed be and what we are supposed to show up for. that feeling of urgency that you just want to go away because it is so damn uncomfortable. for me, the shape/the form of “discipline”in me is transforming and becoming something more like a capacity - to turn toward and be with the urgency and what it hides. to stop and feel and allow what’s moving.
On my morning walks... I keep moving, which takes discipline.
Sometimes it’s so hard but it’s harder when you stop and have to start over again, the reward after completion makes it’s so worthwhile. Another pat on the back makes the likehood of stopping so much less likely.
Pondering, and i agee, some stops, allow me to regroup and refocus, too.